a new little one

So, we're driving to the hospital early tuesday morning for my scheduled elective induction.

We are five days out from the due date and I am already measuring 42 weeks. These dinosaur children have seriously aged me five years too fast. We are thrilled to be having a baby under somewhat controllable circumstances compared to no control and no nurses available with halle's birth. We get there, they check me in, they hook me up, and at about 8:30 they start the pitocin. Halle is safe with the Bells so mom could be in the delivery room.

At this point I have barely felt any contractions and am already dilated to a 5.

I get my epidural. the anesthesiologist was in a hurry to get to a c-section. That scared me. He did the deed and I start to go numb and am incredibly happy I have felt almost zero pain. 11:30 the nurse comes to check me and asks Wes to guess what I am dilated to. He says probably a 6. She checks and says I am now a 10 and it is time to get the doctor and push. Whoa baby, we are going to have a baby before lunch. My doctor had joked that we could have a baby before lunch, but had no idea just how true that statement would be. I am feeling amazing and think every birth should be like this.

I start to push.

Soon miss lily's head makes her debut.

The details of this birth from this point on were unknown to me until much later. No one let on that anything was wrong, so the whole time I am in a drugged happy place thinking everything is going great. How Wes kept a straight face I will never know.

So the head is out, but it comes out with the cord wrapped around the neck. No biggie, just get the rest of the body out and everything is fine. Except that her shoulder is stuck behind my pubic bone. Apparently this is a delivery complication that doctors train for called shoulder dystocia. I suspected something was up when they were having me push even when I wasn't contracting and then when they really started almost to get on my case about pushing and they were inverting the bed so my head was below my legs I figured something was not right. Finally the shoulders were delivered and luckily they didn't have to break any collar bones. Head delivered at 11:44 and the rest delivered at 11:46.

She was huge.

And beautiful.

And wouldn't cry.

She made the tiniest little whining noise and it was hard for her to even do that. The nurses kept trying to rough her up to get her to open her lungs and scream, but she wouldn't. She was working way too hard to breathe, so they decided to take her to a nursery and put her on oxygen. She weighed in at a whopping 9lbs 5oz. I now know why I was measuring 42 weeks!

They let me hold sweet Lily for about 47 seconds before they took her away.

It is a weird feeling to have your baby taken away without knowing what is wrong with her. So they stitched me back up and made sure I was fine and then took me in a wheel chair down to the nursery. If it is weird to have your new baby taken away from you it is even weirder to see them hooked up to all kinds of cords, monitors, and machines.

They took me to a recovery room while they took Lily off of oxygen to see if they had opened up her lungs. Halle actually got to see Lily through the glass at this point. The little sweetheart looked in there and asked if she could put a blanket on Lily. I think they bonded right there.

Bad news came, she was still holding her breath and working too hard so they decided to do a chest x-ray. The chest x-ray showed some haze in her lungs but nothing that jumped out at them. It was awful waiting in my room with Wes, worrying, while they tried to figure out what was going on. Wes and Gary gave little Lily a blessing and the next time they tried to take her off oxygen she was breathing fine! They cleaned her up and several hours after she was born she was all ours in my room. Halle got to hold her for the first time and is the sweetest big sister. Grandma Nimer and Uncle Ryan also came to visit. The Bells had to head off to New York so they didn't get to hold her until a few days later, but I am so grateful they took care of Halle all morning. Mom spent the night with me in the hospital and it seemed like everything was okay

That lasted about 10 hours.

Because she was such a big baby they kept monitoring her blood sugar. It was on the low normal side. It didn't help that I wasn't allowed to give her that first feeding for several hours. And then it turns out she wasn't a fan of eating and doing the whole suck and swallow thing. She barely ate anything and her blood sugar kept getting lower and lower. Finally at midnight it was dangerously low and she was taken back to the nursery to be put on an IV. Oh I hated it. By this time my epidural is wearing off and I am noticing something is not right. There is terrible shooting pain every time I try to move, lift, or put pressure on my right leg. I can't walk without a lot of assistance and something to lean on. We figure the pain will go away quickly as my body recovers and don't pay too much attention to it. I pump and visit Lily every couple hours. She finally figures out how to suck because I made them give me a binky to try to get her to learn. Halle had the same issue. She eventually learns to eat through a syringe and has to be fed formula so they can get her blood sugar up in the next few days so she can hopefully come home with me.

My second day in the hospital was something I will never forget. They kept Lily in the nursery all day. Wes stayed with me all day while Halle was at home with Grandma Nimer. Because of the pain in my leg I literally could not even get to the bathroom without Wes helping me. He did EVERYTHING for me that day. He ordered my food, got me water, started my shower, absolutely everything. I don't think you really know how much someone loves you until you can't help yourself and the other person has to step up and pick up the slack in a big way. I didn't know it was possible but my love for Wes grew so much that day. I don't think we realize how great our husbands are until we give them a chance to be great. Our relationship was strengthened as we spent so much time together laughing at office episodes and holding our beautiful baby as she struggled to eat.

My favorite times when I was in the hospital were when they brought Halle to visit me. I loved snuggling with her on my bed watching movies. There is something about that girl that brightens up any room she is in. And I really needed her when things were hard with Lily. The hardest part about staying near Lily was being away from Halle.

During that second day Lily started to keep her blood sugar up so they started to wean her off the IV to see if she could keep it up on her own and so I could hopefully bring her home with me. She did great throughout the night and the next morning I was able to check out with my new baby in tow. Halle was so excited to bring her home.

We had to go back for jaundice checkups and my doctor sent me to the ER because apparently it is not normal to be unable to walk due to pain after giving birth. The ER couldn't decide if it was a damaged nerve, a severely pulled muscle, or a bruised bone that was causing so much pain. They sent me home with crutches and no diagnosis. We have been to that hospital way too many times now. So at least the no walking thing was fixed. I couldn't put any pressure on my right leg and no one could tell me what was going on. Nothing changed for a whole week and I was starting to get nervous about my mom heading home and Wes going back to work. I couldn't even carry my baby around, how was I supposed to do this alone? Miraculously, the day my mom left the pain improved so much I could walk and now I am basically normal just sore if I walk a lot. I truly believe my prayers and the prayers of so many family members were answered in the hour that I needed them to be.

Lily is a wonderful addition to our family, but oh it was a little bit of a rough start getting her here. She sleeps like an angel, eats dainty little portions, thinks she is all that, and spits up like there is no tomorrow.

Halle adores her and is so helpful. She bounces her when she starts to whine and tells me I need to feed her if she starts to cry. I sometimes feel so guilty about the time with Halle I have had to give up to take care of Lily. But I know there are so many things Lily can teach Halle that I never could

one week old

We are so happy to have little Lily be a part of our world.

welcome to the world

lily carolyn bell

9lbs 5 oz and 20.5 in

April 5, 2011 11:46 a.m.

we are in love

the insane roller coaster birth story featuring a lightning fast three hour labor and delivery, a little shoulder dystocia, a nine pound baby in the nicu, and a mommy on crutches is coming soon!

wes went across the country when i was 38 weeks pregnant

you didn't believe me did you?

here is the proof.

this is wes at the byu basketball sweet sixteen game in new orleans.

yes, you read that right. new orleans. you know the one in louisiana.

his dad asked if he wanted to go Wednesday afternoon and after making sure i was okay with it they hopped on a plane that very same night.

and yes i was 38 weeks pregnant at the time.

and yes wes was terrified i was going to go into labor while he was gone.

and no i wasn't too terrified or concerned because i hadn't been feeling hardly any contractions.

the great part about this trip was that his family was out of town (kendyl in peru, michele in st. george) and my family was in st. george as well.

but, how sweet to know that i wouldn't be alone because i had a sweet brother nearby whom i know would come no matter what. and he actually did come and spend an evening with me and he even brought pizza. i also have the dearest cousins so close who would drop everything if i needed them to and i feel pretty good about calling wes's extended family too. seriously we are surrounded by greatness.

so it really was me and halle all alone in the house.

what did we do that first night?

hopped over to the maverick and loaded up on sugar to eat our feelings because who really likes to be alone? she chose chocolate covered pretzels and i chose a slurpee. bad idea to eat all that sugar right before her bed time.

obviously nothing happened baby wise because i am still typing this with a big tummy sitting out in front of me.

a lot of people wondered why i let him go and what he was thinking. i just thought his dad wanted to take him to see his favorite college basketball team in a state and city he had never been and i really felt fine so why not? you know you would do the same thing. seriously, a once in a life time opportunity to see the jimmer and all that. i think i would have felt worse if i had made him stay home and nothing happened.

anyway, they had a lovely father/son trip driving through the bayou. watching the sad byu game and the butler game afterwards.

they even checked out bourbon street. which is seriously sketchy, but how could you not when you are in new orleans.

because byu lost they came home earlier then planned so it ended up being a short trip

they really had a great time together and even came back with a witch doctor doll for halle, which she loves because of the Princess and the Frog movie.

i love that he got to take this trip with his dad and that the baby was not born while he was away.

intense

this girl is intense.

and bursting with personality.

her imagination is out of this world.

i don't know how many times a day she goes to the royal ball or the dinosaur museum or picks berries in the forest or follows a treasure map to "halle's hideout" or sets up her own office for "doctor halle" or dresses up in wes's ties and my shoes with her notebook heading off to the grocery store to be the mama. (i don't wear wes's ties so i don't know where she gets that one from.)

she is an all or nothing girl.

example of all and then nothing: one day she did all of her business on the potty. hasn't done it like that since and is a major potty tease.

another example of all or nothing: i was teaching her how to use scissors, the way to hold them, and how to cut paper. she was becoming very frustrated because she couldn't get her fingers right. she got up walked away from me and turned around and said "i can't learn." and that was that.

she knows what she wants to do and isn't afraid to ask, but does not throw tantrums if she can't have what she wants.

she can be reasoned with and is mostly easy going.

she hates pop and most kinds of juice. she would much rather drink water.

she thinks she is getting a "ladder bed" (a bunk bed) we obviously spent way too much time at furniture stores looking for beds. she will be sorely disappointed when her new sleigh bed comes, but of course she will deal and love it.

she seriously refuses to learn her letters. every letter we work on is "t." I will actually show her a letter and tell her the name and then quickly ask her what letter that is and she will still say "t."

she loves her friends at joy school and thinks up funny things to say to them. she does an impression of vector on "despicable me" that is hilarious. she always asks if she can do it for her friends or say other silly things to them, but of course they don't understand that she is being funny and have no idea what she is talking about.

she asked for some pretzels for a snack the other day and quickly corrected herself. she said "pretzel" correctly the first time, but hurried and said "pee-oh-poles" which is what she has called pretzels for the last year.

the first thing she says after she does something naughty is, "i like you mommy."

she doesn't say "hey everybody!" she actually says, "hey every guys!"

she is mostly very obedient.

we're very lucky that way.

where did this sweetheart come from?

i have no doubt she is going to be a helpful and loving big sister.

the love we have for this kikster is intense.

saddle me up

my feet only like my toms. thank goodness i have three pair and one of them is sparkly.

i wear wes's shirts to bed and now i wear them out and about. they just feel good.

i wear wes's shorts to bed. don't worry i still have enough decency to wear my maternity skinny jeans when i am out and about.

it is too hard to shave me legs.

we are really just lucky i still have the motivation and the ability to shower.

baby clothes are washed and ready.

bassinet is put together and ready.

halle puts her dolls to sleep in the bassinet.

i make halle pick up everything i drop for me.

i peed four times in the middle of the night last night. i totally counted.

up every night from 2-5. bless you pregnancy insomnia.

wes has two weeks of work off starting in one week.

minor contractions few and far between.

so excited to meet our little baby we might explode.

saddle me up. i think we are ready.

special mommy and halle time

I went to the doctor a couple of weeks ago where he told me I was already dilated (TMI??). Inside I started to panic. I don't feel like I have done all the last minute things I wanted to do with Halle before the new baby comes. So I decided to just act like the baby was coming soon and spend a couple mornings doing special mommy and halle things. The first morning we spent playing at McDonald's playplace. Lame? Maybe. But, ever since Halle realized she could climb up to the big twisty slide it is one of her favorite things to do. I bought her some lunch and when she saw apples instead of french fries in her happy meal she said, "why mama? i want french fries." So I bought her some fries, because it was a special morning and let her wear herself out to her hearts content. I love hearing her yell "whoa whoa whoa" the whole way down that big slide.

Another morning I took her to one of her most favorite places, the Thanksgiving Point dinosaur museum.

The big shark is always a little scary for her.

The highlight was digging for dinosaur bones. She was digging for awhile and then realized the little brush could be used as cleaning tool just like princesses, so she "cleaned" the sand pits.

Afterwards we ate lunch at the Thanksgiving point cafe and finished it off with some ice cream.

She is such a fun buddy. She has always been so easy going and interested in new places. I don't believe our relationship is over once we bring baby home I just know it won't be the same. I feel much better about welcoming another child now that I have these last few memories of just me and my little kiks. Nothing has brought me more joy then showing her new things and taking her to get little treats that light up her face. Now if only I wasn't so huge and it wasn't such a big no no at this point in my pregnancy, I would take her to one of those bouncy house/slide places.

my little sickie

I knew this winter was too good to be true. We were getting by with no major illnesses until Saturday night. Miss Halle who was her normal happy energetic self all day went to bed and woke up at 12:30 and couldn't sleep. She tossed and turned until I heard her tell me "my ear needs a bandaid." And so began our up all night slumber party. I was pretty sure it was an ear infection and knew she wouldn't be able to sleep so we watched movies. Our old "Halle's sick and can't sleep" method that worked last year. She only whines about the pain when she is trying to sleep so it is better to let her stay up until she crashes. I must say that watching Despicable Me in the middle of the night is much more enjoyable then watching Finding Nemo in the wee hours.

She finally crashed at 6:30 for a few hours and we were ready to take her to urgent care as soon as she woke up to get her checked out and get some antibiotics. She woke up and said her ear was fine. She was completely normal all day until about 5 when she said her ear was owie again, so we took her over to urgent care along with every other sick person in Utah county. She played so well and never complained once while all the toddlers around her were screaming about their ears hurting. We finally saw a doctor and were told she had an infection in each ear. How on earth was this child so happy and energetic? We would never have known if she hadn't been able to speak. Best sick kid ever. There was hardly any indication that she could get an ear infection. She had had a runny nose a few weeks ago and that was it. Apparently it was enough to infect her ears. The doctor also suspected she had pink eye so we left eye drops and a diagnosis. Now finding a pharmacy open on a Sunday night is pretty tricky in Utah. Wes was gone most of the night waiting at the only Walgreens that was open along with every other sick person in Utah County to get her antibiotics.

Needless to say we were glad that day was over. And now I have a very happy little sickie who keeps telling me she is not sick because she wants to go to the dinosaur museum and mcdonald's play place and that she doesn't need tylenol, but rather chocolate.